I’m a Sell Out!

Maybe not, but I certainly came close. I sold a healthy amount of paté and rillette  at the Greenpoint Food Market on Saturday.  If you weren’t able to make it, don’t fret – there is bigger news…

I am now available at a market here in Brooklyn! I am proud to announce that Brooklyn’s very own Choice Greene Market on Greene and Grand is now carrying my paté and rillettes. They bought all my remaining stock. I was so thrilled that I might have let down my guard and acted somewhat unprofessionally. I think I yelled, “Holy crap, you’re really going to buy it!” Okay, that is a bit of an exaggeration, but I was really excited.

So, thank you Choice Market for being the first place to take a chance on a scrappy charcuterie maker who hails from the mean streets of the Upper West Side (they were much meaner in the 70’s).

Rillettes Already, The Wait For More Paté Is Over!

Peck's Pate

Peck's Pate

Hello Everyone!

To all my fans, each and everyone of you, I am back.  And, I did not come alone. I brought along my good fatty pals: Paté and Rillettes.  Nothing says I love you quite like a little jar of meaty goodness.  I will be selling them tomorrow at The Greenpoint Food Market.  After my successful visit last time, I cannot wait until tomorrow. I’ll be there with my patient Girlfriend who will kindly be spreading ungodly amounts of paté and rillette on crackers while I tell people about the health benefits of  Charcuterie.

It is so exciting because I get an opportunity to cook the way I am supposed to…plus, I get to start with all of this:

Starting Point

Starting Point

Remember, you will look like a Rock Star at Thanksgiving if you show up with the best Brooklyn-made, artisanal  charcuterie.  Besides, you need something in your system to soak up all the alcohol as you listen to your relatives drone on about how cool they used to be.  It’s also the perfect gift for the food-obsessed hipster (which Brooklyn seems to be teeming with lately).

It boils down to this: If you love someone, set them free with jars of deliciousness.

By the way, it is taking place at the Church located at 129 Russell St.

RECAP – MAD CAP – The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment

What a day! What a life. It is the day after and I feel blessed to have been a part of The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment.  For the Beer Experiment I was inexperienced – I finished, but it was too quick. And I am not sure she had any fun, but the cigarette afterwards made me feel like a man. Wait, what the hell am I talking about?

Doling out the Goods

It was game day my friends and all the competitors brought their A-games. Normally, I look for Bonnie Suarez to be leading the pack, but she had her equals. This was easily the best food we had at any competition. There were no stinkers. No dishes that lead me to believe I would be going to the hospital. The chefs delivered.  In kind, we responded. Nick and I vowed to give something to everybody who participated.  I hope everyone loved their “Beat Me or Eat Me” T-Shirt. You can wear it anywhere from the gym to your next PTA meeting. I can’t please everyone all the time, except for my girlfriend (fat chance). Seriously, the chef’s well-being and enjoyment are very important to us.  Even though, I told Nick that people have to “Suck it Up,” I was totally referring to something else. Not weed – smart ass!

Team Peanut

I was really impressed by some dishes that were under my radar. Can you believe how good the vegetarian chili was? Team Peanut, you stole my vegetarian girlfriend’s heart. I am not joking. If you read this, can you post the recipe so this “dumbass” can know make it. I had her thinking that you could only make chili with meat. Plus, I was absolutely convinced that the last thing I want to eat at an “Experiment” was a tame old brownie – but it was great. Who knew that Attic Sugar Bakery was for real? I like the crisp top the most. I feel texture is often overlooked.

Attic Sugar Bakery and their Hazelnut Brownies

We gave the Nick and Theo prize to Rebecca Marx and Pervaiz Shallwani. I thought that their hush puppies were very good and the crunch of the cereal benefitted them tremendously. (On a side note, if you win the “Nick and Theo” prize, thank BOTH Nick and Theo.)  Alright, I have to give some space to one of my favorite competitors, Bonnie Suarez. I know she is Nick mom. I have been to her house – duh. But she can really cook. Her dish was a complete pleasure. A dish that was subtle, that still managed to stand out at a food competition.

I want to give a shout out to two of my sentimental favorites: The Righteous Burn Pirates and The Working Class Foodies!!! First, WCF’s dish was a total save. They actually had a colossal shit show trying to make marshmallows for their original idea. Yet, they still pulled off a surprisingly good dish. Alas, not a winner, but the Creme Anglaise was very well done. Second, The Pirates, the idea was great, but I think that the conditions were a challenge for the dish. With that said, I have the upmost respect for them. Their desire and sweat is hard to match.

Sara Haines from the Today Show tasting the "Burn"

I waited to talk about the big winners until the end. They got tons of good press already. ROOPA, way to go kiddo. She got married and brought the hurt. Who knew she could do it. That was some ice cream, and homemade cones… Then, the Pig in Drag was just perfect. The meat was well-cooked and the sauce was perfectly seasoned. Tremendous dish guys. I hope to see you both at the next one.

Lei Takahashi with "Pig in Drag"

Lei Takahashi - "Pig in Drag"

theo MC

yours truly

Roopa Sweeps Audience and Judges First Place

With that said, we still do not know what we are going to do next. We have some ideas. So until then, keep experimenting!!!

The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment Results:

Judges Award

1st – Roopa Marcello – Thai Chocolate Ice Cream
2nd –  Bonnie Suarez – Chocolate Black beans with cauliflower and pork belly
3rd –  Attic Sugar Bakery – Hazelnut Brownies

Honorable Mention Sweet  -   Alyssa Lees – Deconstructed Truffles
Honorable Mention Savory  - Lei Takahashi – “Pig in Drag”

Nick and Theo Prize –  Pervaiz Shallwani + Rebecca Marx – Chocolate Hush Puppies

Audience Award


1st –  Roopa Marcello – Thai Chocolate Ice Cream
2nd –  Lei Takahashi – “Pig in Drag”
3rd –  Team Peanut – Chocolate Chipotle Chili

Recap RoundUp:

The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment!

I am truly excited for The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment. I was nervous about the Beer Experiment, and I was worried about lactose intolerance for the Cheese Experiment. For the Chocolate Experiment, I am feeling energized – in a good way. It has been a hectic day as we have had some last minute contestants get in under the wire. Some contestants emailed me their final dishes, WOW, I am psyched to try them. Yes, they are experimental, but I can see them working out in a really good way. This might be the best group of dishes I have seen. I am handicapping the dishes in my head. This will be the best cook-off we have ever thrown (sorry beer and cheese).

Let me not forget, and let me give this news it’s own paragraph – The NBC Today Show is bringing a crew to film the festivities. I am finally going to  be famous, by hook or by crook! What the hell does that expression mean anyway?

Plus, we are constantly getting more great prizes to give away. We’ve got a chocolate of the month certificate from Ricard Chocolat, four copies each of La Maison du Chocolat and Jacques Torres’ A Year in Chocolate from Abrams Books, gift certificates, limited edition skateboards, more chocolaty goodness and of course, CASH. There is chocolate all over my apartment right now – all to be given away. My girlfriend had to stop me from peaking inside the sealed  deluxe chocolate pack from Taza.

I hope to see the 11 people who read this blog on Sunday at the Bell House. If you are one of those lost souls who accidentally stumble upon my blog looking for a photo of a penguin cake, welcome, and check out The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment. It’s worth the trip.

I will see you there!!!

One Year Later…

How Am I Doin?

How Am I Doin?

I realized last night (when I started this post it was “last night”) that it had been a year since I began this quixotic quest to recover.  Recover basically after I lost it all. This has been no easy task. I got so close to owning my own business that sometimes I lose sleep at night thinking about it. I have had so many restless nights that my light sleeping Girlfriend is more tired than she needs to be.

What could have been a terrible year has turned out to be surprisingly uplifting. I was just thinking about my choice of word, uplifting. I feel more positive about my future even though I do not show it for fear of ruining my reputation as a neurotic Jew. I will admit that most of it is due to my incredibly supportive, super patient Girlfriend.

casserole crazy 2008

the crowning of last year's king

The reason for looking back is that last night was the Casserole Crazy contest at Brooklyn Label. A year ago I was introduced to the world of competitive cooking and was anointed Casserole King. Though I did not win last night’s casserole contest, I realized later on (much later on) that I didn’t care about winning. All I had to do was look around and see how it has all changed for the better.  I was happy that my friend won the contest. A friend I did not have a year ago. I am writing about it on a blog that I did not have a year ago. A year ago I lived alone in Manhattan. Now, I am in an apartment that I share with the Girlfriend in BROOKLYN. This makes me really happy. Is this getting sappy yet? I could get a lot worse. I mean, the new apartment is filled with mosquitoes and it is October.

To be honest, I thought that I would have a clear direction by now, that I would be laser focused on a single challenge. Yet, I feel constantly pulled in different directions. I have the cooking competitions, freelance catering gigs, underground restaurant work, paté entrepreneur, consulting, etc. It might seem great to have unique challenges present themselves constantly, but the grass in always greener. The idea of one solid paycheck is tempting. It would ease my worried heart. I live in New York, not South Dakota. You need a good paycheck. How else am I going to eat well? My friends, I like to eat well….

Overall, I’m happy-ish and that is alright for now.

casserole

Kentucky Fried Casserole - yum

 

 

Happy National Chocolate Day

What an appropriate day to announce The Brooklyn Chocolate Experiment. I am excited to let everyone know that it is taking place November 15th. This is going to be the best one yet as we are collaborating with Food52’s Amanda Hesser and Merrill Stubbs. The judges are going to be fantastic, the food, the freebies, the prizes – Simply the best.

So what is the best gift idea for the chocolate-obsessed in your household? Besides a fudge shower (whatever that is), it’s tickets to the Chocolate Experiment.

My Girlfriend loves chocolate AND cats, what am I to do?

Girlfriend Loves Cats Too Much

Girlfriend Loves Cats Too Much

30 Pounds of Brats? No Problem

How Do You Turn This…

All you need on a desert island

All you need on a desert island

Into This…

Sweet Love

Sweet Love

Simple.  It’s all explained in this great video:

Bratwurst with Theo Peck | Working Class Foodies

It’s October, the leaves are starting to change, the temperature is getting cooler, and you are starting to think about two things: beer & bratwurst. At least that’s what I am thinking about. So I figured that it was no coincidence that in the past month I was asked twice to make brats. What exactly are brats? Let’s consult the experts on everything- Wikipedia. Actually, I just read the definition on Wikipedia and it made no sense.  I hope a true bratwurst historian has some time to clean that up. Anyway, my definition is much more concise. A bratwurst is a sausage that usually has not only pork and fat back, but also veal. In addition, it is emulsified with more fat (cream and eggs) and heavily seasoned with ginger, nutmeg, and white pepper.

We, the American people, believe that no Oktoberfest would be complete without the Bratwurst so why should you?  I am here to tell you is that making sausage is easy. It might take a little more time, but I believe it is worth it. Why? Well, have you ever noticed that almost every sausage you get at the store tastes the same. That is because they are all the same. The difference with my Brats is grinding the nutmeg and dried ginger with a microplane just before using them. It enhances the spices, creating a well seasoned piece of cheap meat.

My first brat experience this month occurred when the good people over at Working Class Foodies, Rebecca and Max (who are award winning contestants at my Food Experiments) asked me to help out on their web tv show. They wanted to do an episode on making bratwurst.  Little did they know I was a professional. It was a great experience that I do not need to write about because the video does such a good job. Check out some of their other videos at hungrynation.tv.

My second brat-portunity came when the Bell House asked me to cater their awesome Octoburlesk party. What better to add to semi naked ladies and a polka band then a grill filled with homemade brats?  I will be up front with you. I did not realize how difficult it would be to make 30 pounds of brats in my tiny kitchen. It was a long and arduous. Two full days went into the prep. My hand went numb after trimming 30 pounds of pork butt and 10 pounds of fat back. I had Nick Suarez come over and help.  Sadly, all he got to do was grind a shit load of spices.

So here’s how to get from a whole lotta meat to a whole lotta brats:

1. Cut the meat

Pork Butt Whole

Pork Butt Whole

2. Do not forget to find the glands and cut them out.

Garbage

Garbage

3. Dice and Grind

Dice, Spice, & Grind

Dice, Spice, & Grind

4. Emulsify with Cream and Eggs

Beat the Meat

Beat the Meat

5. Stuff, Stuff, and Stuff…This is 30 pounds people, this takes a while

Keep on Stuffin'

Keep on Stuffin'

Now we tie them, poach them in beer, and get them to the damn Bell House. Oops, I almost forgot. I must make a ton of curry aioli. I was thinking of the curry wurst idea, but I hate ketchup on my sausages, and so should you. So, instead I made the aioli, and it was frickin’ delicious. I made it spicy with roasted curry powder, turmeric, cumin, and a ton of raw and poached garlic. I wish I had pictures of it’s neon yellow deliciousness…

I had no idea what to expect at Octobulesk. Anywhere between 100 and 200 people were expected. That is a large gap. Plus, did people really want to eat my brats? Who was I? I was very worried on my way to the event trying to decide where I was going to keep all the extra brats. I kept imagining my vegetarian girlfriend looking in the freezer and seeing all her green peas and veggie burgers displaced, made refugees by my 30 pound tribe of brats.

I get to the Bell House and I see Nick’s friendly face. He didn’t seemed worried. Why should he? There was no spice grinder in sight. Super friendly GM William was nowhere to be seen. I was confused until I realized that he was putting on the super good looking lederhosen.  Yet, somehow, when you combine October, Beer, and Brats, shorts with suspender don’t look so bad.  Will wasn’t the only one…there was a polka band:

Fashion?

Fashion?

I started to relax once the sweet girlfriend arrived sporting the cute German girl braids.  I find those braids so cute, why? I do not really like Germans, being jewish and all….

Nick and I calmly set up shop expecting a long night of slow grilling. We got our tongs and game faces together.

Ready

Ready, set, grill

This is the last time we were still for the next hour and half. The crowd that lingered before we were ready turned into a deluge… I was beside myself with joy, everything was moving so fast. All I had time to do was look down and make brats “all the way” which means with curry aioli, sweet onion, and kraut. Thank god the reliable Nate came by to say hi. You might remember him from the Underground Restaurant.  Well, Nate just put on a pair of rubber gloves and jumped right in, no questions asked. So Nick maned the grill, I took orders and transferred from grill to bun, Nate dressed them up, and girlfriend took the money (her specialty). She did not let one person pass unpaid for, she is tough for a veggie.

just getting started

just getting started

and going, and going, and going

and going

lining up for brats

We started with 125 brats, and 156 buns. I brought a spare pork belly, originally to share with the GM. I had invited him to the house last week and we had to cancel at the last minute. I felt terrible so I brought the belly for him to eat. It was a great idea, but for a different reason.  We ended up selling all the pork belly as well.  Sorry Will.

I was super excited that we sold out within an hour and fifteen minutes, but I felt like shit because there were people still on line. I never expected this outcome. The nicest thing I saw was the customers upfront ordering less so the ones left on line could still have some.  There’s nothing more heartwarming than a crowd of sympathetic sausage lovers.

The Brooklyn Cheese Experiment – I am still feeling my whey…

Man o Man,

I am still recovering from The Brooklyn Cheese Experiment. I cannot believe I was jealous of Nick when I saw that beer in his hand and it was only 12:15. I asked him, “Dude where did you get that?” (despite the fact that we were standing next to a bar with two bartenders behind it). That is how it all started at The Brooklyn Cheese Experiment, the premier food sport event of the United States, quite possibly the world. If I am exaggerating, please prove me wrong.

Within an hour of asking Nick about his beer, I was already two into my day, and I was telling the cheftestants to, “Get your shit together!” Can we be serious for a moment?  I love the chefs, really, they are the great part of these events. I relate to these people who are willing to toil and sweat in their kitchen determined to make a great dish, win the adulation of the audience, take home the prizes, and achieve COOK OFF GLORY…

Sadly, not everyone can win. Nick and I first decided to do these events because we wanted to make the chefs feel appreciated. We were so happy to get the chefs their own bucket of free beers, top that with free vodka drinks, and melt on top of that a table filled with 20 pounds of cheese. Frankly, I am getting a little nauseous just thinking about it. Because by the time the event was over, I had no idea how many drinks I had. That is how you know that you have had too much to drink.

Nick and I drove to the event discussing the possible winners from the entry form submissions. It’s funny how what is on paper is ever so slightly (or vastly ) different from reality. As we pull up to The Bell House, it finally hit me.  I finally got excited. It is a great feeling to know that 350 people are about to show up ready to have a good time. From that point on, time started to move quickly.

When we entered the Bell House, Will (the General Manager) is on the machine that lifts him to the ceiling so he can change light bulbs, and all of sudden I am distracted by the desire to have one of those machines. Focus. Time started to race, the video cameras got set up, photos start to be taken, the chefs started to show up, some were late (some were very fucking late). My sweet girlfriend arrived, and all was right with the world.

My girlfriend looked fresh as a daisy in her new, “Beat Me or Eat Me” t-shirt available for ONLY $15.  Get yours today, they’re going fast.  Why wasn’t Nick wearing his? I think I need to make him a t-shirt with a tie clip on it.

Anyway, the event started to gain some traction once the judges began to arrive. This crop of judges was so friendly and nice. Andrew Knowlton was curious to know if the contestants were versed in proper food handling. I tried to reassure him that our chefs have only the finest sensibilities. I believed that to be true until… I saw a finger used as a spatula.  No need to name names here, but for the love of god – use utensils to spread out your food people!

Back to the story at hand, I watched as the judges patiently sifted through the dishes to pick their favorites. They chose Bonnie Suarez’s cold tomato ricotta soup with cheese cracker for first place. The soup was fantastic, and my personal favorite. One day, I look forward to competing against her. I think I could take her. I am scared just writing that sentence. You do not talk smack to Bonnie Suarez if you hope to survive to see another day.

Then came ‘The Walk’. This is where Will, Nick, and I try everyone’s dish to determine the scope of the contest and pick our favorite. It is one of the highlights of the event, as we all have too much fun. We chose Alyssa Lees’ puff with Blue Cheese and Fig. It was tougher than you think to pick just one.  We only have one prize to give, but there were honorable mentions:

  • Anu Ogirala’s Indian Delight
  • Frankie Celenza’s Vespa,
  • Cathy Erway’s Homemade Ricotta,
  • David and Karol’s Mini Burgers

You all deserve jars of Peck’s Paté, not yet available for retail sale (but soon god dammit).

Next, everyone on stage for the Miss America moment. I like this part. I get to speak on the mike in front of an audience who has been softened by beer for over three hours. I always hope this will make me sound funnier. People complain that I go on forever on stage, but I have to thank the sponsors. How do you think we get such great prizes?  Well, the audience voted and they chose a very enthusiastic team for first place: Righteous Burn. They made an Asian inspired shaved beef cheese steak served atop a toast mini Eggo waffle. I thought there dish was great, but I told them next time: make your own waffles…no Eggos ever again! I am such a hard ass, but I am trying to make you better. I hurt you because I love you.

Anyway, the after party was a blur of free cheese, butter, and vodka. Sounds just like college in Vermont minus the copious amounts of weed. It looked as if cheese exploded all over the front room, a yellow sock of love. Did everyone have some of the cloth bound cheddar cheese? Awesome! I hope all the contestants enjoyed themselves.

In a moment of pure joy, afterwards, my girlfriend and I joined Nick and the other Suarezes for a lazy susan meal of Chinese food at Lucky Eight. I love Lucky Eight. I have been going for years and apparently Nick’s family goes as well. It is so nice to go with people who eat meat (no offense to my favorite herbivore). Papa Suarez ordered two of everything as if we just came out of the desert, and of course we ate as if we just came out of the desert. I cannot think of a moment where I have ever turned down Chinese food. After eating and drinking all afternoon, this meal was a lot for my system. I had a shut down. I had to drive home with the windows down low.

I’ll post photos  soon, but for now you can find some on all these recaps:

Paté, your new best friend?

I love my label. I must thank poster dude.

I love my label. I must thank poster dude.

Thursday Night 8 PM:

I have to cook ten pounds of paté by Saturday, and yet here I am watching the U.S. Open Tennis match.

Well, maybe a bunch of you people out there think that’s no problem. But hell, that is a lot of frickin’ paté.  I have a booth at the inaugural Greenpoint Food Market this Saturday.  I am excited to finally have an outlet where I can sell it. By the way, this not the same pate I told you about in Pat E Kiernan.

I am making Chicken Liver Terrines – let me emphasize that this does not taste like the ubiquitous chicken liver mousse found in almost every restaurant in New York. I think the state of chicken liver in the city has reached new lows. They all taste like mud. I am a traditionalist charcuterie guy. My paté is creamy, smooth, assertively flavored, it is the SHIT.

YUMMERS

YUMMERS

My vegetarian girlfriend has insisted that I share the news that came out several months ago linking paté and dog food. If that is true, it must have been some fucking tasty dog food. My mom feeds her dog paté which drives me nuts. She will feed some of my paté to the dog and say, “Coco is your biggest fan!” Does she think I am cooking for dogs??

THE BROOKLYN CHEESE EXPERIMENT

Guess what photo my girlfriend found?

Guess what photo my girlfriend found?

I had a dream last night: I came through a mist to a room full of lactose intolerant people sucking back cheese inspired dishes. It was a nightmare. It wasn’t a mist. Oh no, it was something much worse…it was the gas from their collective intolerant asses.

I just repeated that line on my very tolerant girlfriend. It got the thumbs down. But I haven’t done a post forever. I have to break through the summer malaise. (Beside my friend Ted, did you know that Jimmy Cater never actually said malaise?) It has been a summer of ups and downs. Any line would have been fine, right?

Just got home from a Maine vacation and I am excited for The Brooklyn Cheese Experiment. I know it is 15 days away, but I have so much to do for the event. If  you haven’t heard, Nick and I are doing the Brooklyn Cheese Experiment on September 13th at the Bell House.

Also, Poster Dude from the last event, The Brooklyn Beer Experiment, has taken on the web site. It looks fucking great. Nick and I are starting to look like professional people. The new website is www.thefoodexperiments.com. We even designed some t-shirts to leave a lasting mark.

I almost forgot, Andrew Knowlton from Bon Appetite and Iron Chef America has agreed to judge the event. You could not ask for better. I am quite proud. The Beer Experiment was our baby, but I am beginning to think that The Cheese Experiment is going to be a topper.

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