Bacon Takedown, haven’t the Jews Suffered Enough…

unofficial winner of best sign

The first and most important thing I would like to say is that there was a truly impressive array of bacon dishes.  I have been to five cook offs and the Bacon Takedown feature the best food of them all. The chefs were great.

I have made a profession of burning bridges, I do it well. I am like Sherman strolling through the South. I have a scorched earth personality type. After I burn the bridge, I like to finish the job by salting the earth and dropping the napalm.

I made a mistake on the first post I ever made. I am new to blogging. I posted a recap of the Chili Takedown that was supposed to be private, since I am just trying to write, not be an author.

Well, I made a couple of off the cuff comments about the event and the organizer. Nothing serious, no mama jokes or anything like that…just some gentle ribbing.  Well, somehow the organizer saw it. I had one view in a week and it was him. So, I took it down. I felt terrible, and I apologized
The whole reason I started going and competing in cook-offs was to meet and network with people. I had been unemployed for a long time, and I thought I was going to lose it if I did have a project. It has been very successful, I have met some nice people and I even scored a small cooking  gig.

But, I started to win. As we all know, winning effects you in ways you’ll never know until you are there. I won my first contest to be knighted the Casserole King, and my second(popular vote), my third(popular vote), and my fourth(judges vote).  I started to get pissy because no one was ‘gunning for me’ or ‘worried I might take the crown’. As this past Sunday approached, my only goal became to win, I was getting crazy focused. Like Rocky II, “win, just win…” to which Mick replies, “what are we waiting for!!” cue montage.

Last night, after I got home, I realized that I had lost my mind.  This is not a new or unique feeling for me.  I had a wholesome cartoon moment, “It’s not about winning Charlie Brown, it is about making connections with people who you share a common interest with.” Thank you Lucy, you’re right.

But, I can’t be nice all the time. I can’t be Suarez. He might be the nicest guy I ever met, for the love of god I even like his parents, and I wouldn’t even mind if he won.  Actually, I wouldn’t mind too much.

Alright, I cannot hold off anymore. You actually expect …..settle down Theo…it is only a contest…

deconstructed BLT

deconstructed BLT

But let’s talk about something we can all agree about: Bacon. I was happy with my dish. I cured the bacon with fennel and maple.  Then coated it with buttermilk, panko, and pork rinds; fried it; topped it with sweet dill pickle; finished it with tomato tarragon aioli.  I am going to put together as many of the recipes as I can. I was happy with the dish, and I’ll leave it at that. But I also want to give others credit for making some great dishes.

Bacon Sloppy Joe: well seasoned, great texture.

Bacon Ice Cream: easy to fuck up, you guys did a great job.

Thank you bacon turtle…bacon tamale, etal…

I did not get to taste nearly as many as I wanted, but I have a kitchen, bacon, and plenty of time for experimenting…

For results check Cathy’s wonderful recap at Not Eating Out in New York…

Remember Grasshopper: Take the Path of Least Resistance…

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3 Responses to “Bacon Takedown, haven’t the Jews Suffered Enough…”


  1. 1 Ted March 31, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    Well said grasshopper.

  2. 2 Karin April 4, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    Hey Theo. Love the sign. Keep up the good eats.

  3. 3 Ted April 5, 2009 at 2:29 am

    The more I look at the deconstructed blt, the more I think about how wildly popular it would be down South. I can only imagine the buzz, folks would be like: “did y’all hear about this yankee chef that figured a way to deep fry bacon and kinda glue a pickle to it with some thousand island?” People would line up around the street. You could sell it with chow-chow.

    Ted Baggett, Hypothetical Freelance Culinary Reporter, New York Times.


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