The Nude Year

This title is a thinly veiled attempt to increase my audience. (Is it a Porno Movie title lacking an actual film or a film I do not know about?)  Besides being nude this year on a variety of occasions, this NEW year is one I am looking forward to with great anticipation. I was asked by Brooklyn Paper to make some predictions for the upcoming year, and yes they will all come true.  But it is not the predictions that I am eagerly anticipating or the Oscar and Tony I plan on winning this year…

I am excited to say that I will be entering phase four of my life: true and real adulthood. My Wife and I are expecting. I am still a little nervous saying it. We have moved into the second trimester so I feel I can be a little bit more cavalier with the joyous news. Yet, I am so neurotic. I am worried that something will happen at any moment. Now, I must make it until JUNE with my sanity intact! A tall order even without impending fatherhood.

My first priority this year has been to feed the expectant mother.  In her pregnancy, my wife has slowly drifted towards flexitarianism. She has recently found that humanely-raised, additive-free meat is starting to taste pretty damn good. It’s funny what a couple of odd hormones will do to ya. Although she is not exactly slinging back hamburgers, she did order the fried chicken at Buttermilk Channel recently – after requesting to see the vegetarian menu! Fried Chicken is definitely on her list of approved foods. Yet an odd thing has happened, I have forgotten how to cook the basic meat meals. I have had two utter failures at making roast chicken! This used to be my favorite dish to make. I have undercooked it once and had flabby skin the second time. I feel like Rocky after he got knocked out by Mr.T – I am realizing that I need to start training again! Can someone please cue the montage!?

paella

New Year's Paella

So in the new year I am determined to start perfecting dishes. This requires numerous attempts and sadly – failures. How many times can I ask my wife to eat paella before she revolts and is repulsed by saffron? But in the next few weeks I will attempt to make perfect Roast Chicken, Fried Chicken, Paella, Gratin, Pork Roasts, and more. If my wife is going to join the meat eating crowd, let me at least give her good reason!

New Year's Coconut Cake

New Year's Coconut Cake

I don’t want to forget to tell you that this week, my future child is developing his or her taste buds. I am super excited to make my wife eat a wide range of food so my child has a developed palette out of the womb. Queens – here I come! I am not sure the wife feels the same way.  I have already made her eat very spicy Thai food, next up is more Asian and Southeast Asian. I haven’t forgotten Middle Eastern or Latin. It is going to be a tough few weeks for her. But as I told her: It’s for the baby!

And one big prediction for The Food Experiments: the next one will be The WINE Experiment! Start your engines! Details to follow….

Have a great 2011!

12 Responses to “The Nude Year”


  1. 1 pinky January 11, 2011 at 3:50 pm

    looks like you better enjoy the good eating while you can. I just read “Childless Couples Eat Healthier, Study Finds” in today’s paper:
    “Having children in the house also reduced the demand for meat, and increased the consumption of dairy products, cereal and potatoes.”
    my three favorite food groups!

  2. 2 Karin January 11, 2011 at 4:07 pm

    That cake looks outstanding. Yum!!!!
    Def let us know the date for the wine experiment.

  3. 3 Karin January 11, 2011 at 4:08 pm

    That cake looks awesome. YUMMMMMM!

  4. 4 the girl January 11, 2011 at 5:10 pm

    I always have the undercooking issue with my chicken too. I really need to give it 15 more minutes. The Julia Child method produces amazing results but it takes a LONG time as you’re constantly opening the oven to move the chicken around and bast with butter.

  5. 5 the girl January 11, 2011 at 5:11 pm

    hmm. that’s baste not bast. you know what i mean.

  6. 6 jen eno January 11, 2011 at 8:14 pm

    4 words for perfecting Roast Chicken my friend: Thomas Keller Bouchon Cookbook!

    I love the idea of introducing new foods in the womb. I can say it paid off for the 2.5 yr old Van, who was downing lime-chiptole marinated shrimp on Sunday night. He loves cornichons and all kinds of olives, too.

    … and wine experiments? how awesome, do tell more. after all my last name is eno.

  7. 7 TEDDY January 12, 2011 at 12:56 pm

    ENO – I am not surprised by your TK devotion. What is the TK Recipe? Can you leave it on my site so I can try it?

    – The Wine Experiment is all about cooking with wine, but the wine should be a forward flavor. It cannot be a cup of wine reduced in a two gallon recipe. I am a little worried that their will be a lot of Coq Au Vin. That’s what I would make.

  8. 8 TEDDY January 12, 2011 at 1:00 pm

    GIRL – Does the Julia C recipe leave the skin crispy? What is the key to that recipe? I do not have that recipe either, can I get it? My oven also has been having serious issues. I have beaten up for the past year. The thermostat is totally off. I am scared the wife will never eat roast chicken again

  9. 9 roopa January 12, 2011 at 1:43 pm

    Congratulations! I’m sure you’re going to be an awesome dad. 🙂

    Not sure if I’m in for the Wine Experiment…will keep you posted. But I will definitely NOT be making coq au vin.

  10. 10 TEDDY January 12, 2011 at 1:55 pm

    Roopa – Do I have to challenge you to make a wine dessert?

  11. 11 Elisabeth Overend January 12, 2011 at 10:21 pm

    Dear Theo,

    First of all, many congratulations to you and Wife for such lovely news! Your kid will have a nice summer b-day – I’m June 24, best time of year.

    Secondly, will you now have to rename your blog to carnivore-loves-occasional-flexivore? 🙂

    Just kidding – didn’t mean to stress you with further questions. I’m sure all will be fine, also for the Father-to-be. I look forward to taste his lovely pate’s again, BTW – was out of town for your last batch, drats!

    Everyone take care,

    Elisabeth

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